Well, it turns out that you can cook a big old pork loin in your crock pot without much fussing. You put in some onions and garlic and sugar and salt and spices and water and wine (I put in some sweet chili sauce instead of the Worcestershire in the recipe, and the only wine I had was white instead of red), and you just let it cook. You can cut it up before or during the cooking, whatever you like. (I think it cooks faster if you cut it up, and it also won’t be jammed inelegantly into the pot. But if you don’t like fuss, you can just dump it in.
This is the recipe I used as a base. It looks really good, but I just didn’t have all the ingredients!
At a certain point I tasted the mix that I was cooking it in, decided that it was too pungent, and added a bunch of quince preserves I had around the house. (Some people use apples or apricot preserves or what have you, but I had quince in the fridge.) That cut the pungency and gave it sort of a sweet and sour taste.
The pork didn’t “fall apart” the way most people’s crockpot pork loin apparently does, but it did get tender and easy to separate into smaller pieces. The pork and sauce was very good eating, also.
If you don’t like/use wine (or beer, or cider) when you cook, you can use vinegar or rice vinegar instead.